We are born stupid & die stupid too!

We are born stupid & die stupid too! Yet, we try to live an extremely intelligent & a smart life pretending overflowing confidence. Within this life span, some have tried to extend it ( trying to find the Stone), some have tried to cut it short ( suicide bombers), some have gone to the Moon ( tired of their wives at home), some have dug the Earth ( woke up the sleeping ancestors, look I got Napoleon's head!) & some have tried their best to control the others, peace-war makers ( Without me, this earth won't exist).

As we were all busy watching "Others" in action, we did not have time to think about the absurdity of our lives;

Therefore, we simply need to write them down & laugh about it.

I have thought, done & heard quite absurd & hilarious things in my life, here is a very small list.

1. I have tried to be a Mermaid by tying my legs together from a shoe lace & wearing a bed sheet around my legs. Then I tried to roll, moaned a bit, but I only felt like a serpent may be because there was no water around. Then I have tried to be an indigeneous leader, only wearing a towel around the hips, but later in life I have given that up because guys react differently to that. Women leader or what?

2. Being a kid, I firmly believed that Cricket matches were played inside the television & I avoided any untimely death hit by a ball staying too close. When no one was around, I examined secretly the jack hole & the antenna wire expecting my favourite cricketer to appear, but he never turned up! When I was five I did not know the name Santa in English, I screamed aloud Fanta, Fanta in a carnival in Colombo imitating the other kids, he threw away the small gifts at us, I only managed to collect a handful of pebbles & tears in my eyes.

3. In my attempt to be kind to animals, I have somewhat helped a lady grasshopper to deliver a baby. I consoled her when she was crawling on the glistening tiled floor with a baby about to come out, gave her a bit of water to soothe her labour pains, then I quit home for classes & returned home to find the cute little baby; instead, she had left a poop not a baby,she was actually constipated. In  another situation, I felt sad about a stray cat, wanted to give him a bath & rescue him from the misery, but it scratched me and ran away. I still wonder what the cat thought about me.

4. In France, I was surprised to see Casinos in every small town, never dared to set foot in there ( being a buddhist, we nevr play with money!) till I found later that it was a supermarket chain. Similarly, at Boulanger I could never buy bread but computers & Orange never gave me a glass of juice but a telephone bill! land of contrast, I would say.

5. Once, my friend's car broke down in a car parking at night, I immediately asked the help from an old street vendor who was at the entrance. He smiled innocently & said:

Miss, I don't have one hand!

Another time, I offered a lunch packet to a man sitting on a wall by the sea side in Marine drive, Colombo, he scolded me:

"Do you think I am a beggar, I own all the shops in this area pointing at the luxury shops" I nearly cried.

6. Being an ambassador to oriental medicine, I gave a hot burning Tiger balm to a foreign guy to clear his nose from phlegm, but a bit later he started to scream as he had touched "a place" that should not be touched with tiger balm! Putainnn!

7. Then, I met this super intelligent mathematician- scientist who eats Algebra for breakfast, Computer codes for lunch, analysis on Mars for tea time, Artificial plastic vaginas for Dinner who confessed me quite timidly that he was genetically modified by inserting a chip to his nose when he was abducted by Aliens at the age of 14. He asked me to watch out for Aliens as they can now come to take me away too. Since I was very kind, I listened to him & I even encouraged him to build an airplane run by water. I went to the hardware store to buy the " stuff" for a model airplane. I liked the enthusiasm in people, even if it's to fly with out wings.

8. I lost faith in cosmetics & all beauty related products due to many incidents. Once my beloved father had applied hair removal cream Veet to his hair just before going for a wedding, He said he didn't have time to read the word "removal" . Then, I met this rich looking English couple at Mono prix, who said loudly, Oh, this Mono prix is so cheap. She did not like to see any product below 50 euros! Then, there was another beautiful lady who was talking to a mirror, I liked the way she expressed herself.

9. Recently at the Jewellery section the sales assistant who was very tired of convincing me for one hour:

Miss, you should buy these earrings, your ears look perfect on this! 

What? Ears? What made you say so? Because they look big! (She’s very observant, I have never thought about the size of ears) Now, I rethink before going to the lingerie section.

10. The yuckiest yet the most adorable thing was when a four year old white boy who I used to babysit during my uni days, insisted to lick my brown coloured feet saying, it's chocolate!!!! MMMM. If only his parents knew that their cute little white angel tasted yummy sri lankan chocos!

Finally, I tried to do high jumping in juniour school, I did jump it like one does hurdling, my brain kind of disloacted, since then.....

Have you been any good?

By Jahooli Devi

ඉඹීම යනු ඉඹීම ම නොවේ! To Kiss is not all about kissing

« To kiss in a public place is a legal offense » ai-je lu à l’entrée du jardin municipal, derrière l’église, Une seule fois, sous le slogan commercial de l’île « Every time is tea

time » charbonné par un désœuvré qui attendait le bon vouloir d’une vessie paresseuse, j’ai relevé, ajoutée à la craie par une main dépitée « …and no time ever fucking time »

(Poisson Scorpion, Nicolas Bouvier, 1981, p.78 )

ඉඹීම අද ලංකාවේ විලාසිතාවක් බවට පත් වෙමින් තිබේ. එහි "හොඳ නරක විමසීම" හෝ "එය ගැන කතා කිරීම" මගේ අරමුණ නොවේ. ඉඹීම විවිධාකාරය, ලෝකය බොහෝ කලක සිට ගෝලාකාරය. අද ෆේස් බුකියට එන ලංකාවේ කෙල්ලො කොල්ලො හාදු වරුසා වපුරවති. හග්ස්, බිග් හග්ස් යනුවෙන් හාදු රූප භාවිතා කරමින් ඔවුනොවූන් එකිනෙකාට ආචාර කරගන්නේ නියම සුද්දන් මෙනි. එහි කිසිත් ප්‍රශ්නයක් නැත. මට ප්‍රශ්නය තිබෙන්නේ සැබෑ ජීවිතයේ දීය. කිසි දිනක දැක නැති වුන්ට මූණ පූරා හාදු දීමට මා බොහොම අකමැතිය. නමුත් , ප්‍රසිද්ධියේ සිප ගැනීම තහනම් රටක පෙම්වතාට හග්ස්, ෆ්‍රෙන්ච් කිසස් දීමට මා බෙහිවින්ම රුචිය. මට රුචි නොවන්නේ ගහක් ගලක් ගානේ හන්දියක් ගානේ සිටින උන්ට හාදු දීමය.

මම ප්‍රංශයේ සිටි කාලයේ විශ්ව විද්යාලයේදී ද සිදු වූයේ ඔය ටිකමය. ප්‍රංශ කෙල්ලන් මා දුටු පළමු දින බොන්ජූර් කියා චූස් චූස් ගග මූණ දෙපැත්තට හාදු දී පිලිගත්තත් එදනින් පසු චූස් චූස් ගෑමට මා අනු බල නොදීමෙන් කෙල වූයේ මටය.  මන්ද යත් යහලුවන් ප්‍රමාණය අඩු වීමය. උන් හිතන්නට ඇත්තේ මං මිතුරු වීමට ඇකැමති බවක්ය. ඇත්තටම මට තිබුන ප්‍රශ්නය වූයේ උන් මුහුණ කට හෝදා විශ්ව විද්යාලයට පැමිණේදැයි චකිතයකි. සමහරුන් ලඟ සිගරට් ගඳ, බියර් ගඳ වැඩි නිසා, මම උන් ඉම්ඹේ හුස්ම තද කරගනිමිනි. අනිත් අතට , සමහර සුද්දියෝ මා මඟ හරින්නට ඇත්තේ, මගේ දුඹුරු පාට හම නිසා හෝ මා දුටු විට ඔවුන්ට මතක් වෙන එකම දෙය ස්ලම් ඩෝග් මිල්යනාර් ෆිල්ම් එකේ ඉන්දියාවේ මුඩුක්කුවක් කෙල්ල පමණක් නිසාවෙනි. සුද්දන්ට නම් කෝකත් එකය, කොටින්ම අත ඇල්ලීමද මහත් භාග්‍යයකි! සමර නාකි සුද්දන් ගුඩ් නයිට් කියා කම්මුල් ඉඹීමේ දී බොහෝ විට කාන්තාවන්ගේ තොල් දෙකොණ ඉලක්ක කරන්නේ, හතලිස් ඇඳිරිය නිසා ද, හරිය ට ඉලක්කය ගත නොහැකි නිසාද යයි මට පැහැදිලි නැත.

ප්‍රංශ ක්‍රමයට ආචාර කිරීම ප්‍රංශයේ දී හොඳය. එය ඔවුන්ගේ ආචාර ක්‍රමය වන අතර ඒ සඳහා මම කිසිදු විරෝධයක් නොදක්වමි.

මට දැන් ප්‍රශ්නය වී ඇත්තේ කොලඹ නිශ්ශබ්ද හාදු දෙන නෝනා මහත්තයාල ගෙනි. මඟුල් ගෙවල් මල ගෙවල් වල මේ මල කෙලිය දැන් ජයටම කෙරෙමින් තිබේ.  මම මෙයට මුලින්ම මුහුණ දුන්නේ අක්කාගෙ දෙවන මනමාලී වීමෙනි. ජීවිතය පුරාවට එකදු හාදුවක් නොදී සිටි ලොකු අක්කාට එදින මට හාදු වරුසාවක් දීමට සිදු වූයේ ඡාය රූප ශිල්පියාගේ අණ කිරීමෙනි. "දැන් ඉඹින්න". කැමරාව මා වෙත එල්ල කල අසුරු සැනින් මහත් වූ සහෝදර ප්‍රේමයෙන් මම අක්කාගේ කම්මුල් සිප ගත්තෙමි. අප කවදාවත් ඊට පෙර හාදු දී තිබුනෙ නැත. වැඩේ බයානක වූයේ කැමරා අය්යා අක්කාගෙ මහත්යාට ද හාදු දීමට මට සහ මල් කුමරියන්ට අණ කිරීමෙනි. අය්යාගේ මුහුණ රතුවී දාඩිය ගලන්නට වූයේ හාදුවල රස්නියට ද??

කොටින්ම එදින, මල් බොකිය දීමේදි, කේක් කැපීමේදි, කේක් බෙදීමේ දි, නාන ප්‍රකාර චාරිත්‍ර කිරීමෙදී මට අසීමිත හාදු තොගයක් දීමට සිදු විය. මට පමණක් නොව පැමිණ සිටි සැවොටම විවාහ යුවලට හාදු දීමට සිදු විය. සමහරු වමින් පටන්ගෙන දකුණට හාදු දෙති, සමහරු දකුණින් පටන් ගෙන වමට හාදු දෙති. සමහරු දෙවරක්ම වමට දෙති, සමහරු දෙවරක්ම දකුණට දෙති. සමහරු මූණ ලාවට ලන්කර දෙති, සමහරු දෙන්නදැයි නොදෙන්න දැයි සිතා ලත වෙති. හැබයි කිසිදු සද්දයක් නම් නැත. මේවා සියල්ලම නිශ්ශබ්ද හාදුය.

මෙසේ එලිපිට ආසාවෙන් හාදු දෙන අම්මලා නැන්දල සහ ආච්චි අම්මලා, කොලඹ විහාර මහා දේවි පාර්ක් එකේ කෙල්ලෙක් කොල්ලෙක් අත් වැල් පටලාගෙන හාදුවක් දීමට ලන් වෙද්දී හත්වලාමේ මේකුන්ට විලි ලජ්ජා නැත්දැ යි අහන්නේ ඉතා සීලවන්ත භාවයෙනි. ලංකාවේ චිත්‍රපටිවලද, සිප ගන්නේ කම්මුල් පමණය. ඉතුරු ටික අපි නොදනී. එක්කෝ බඹරෙක් මලින් රොන් ගනියි, නැත්තම් වීදුරු බිඳෙයි. මේවා බලා සැබෑ ජීවිතයේදී ත් කල යුත්තේ මංගල රාත්‍රියේ දී ද වීදුරු බිඳීමය! ප්‍රසිද්ධ ස්ථාන වල සිප ගත හොත් අප හත් මුතු පරම්පරාවේම මූණුවල දැලි ගෑවී හැඳි ගෑවී , අප සනුහරෙම හිරි ඔතප් බිඳී යන බව නොසැකය. කම්මුලත් තොලත් අතර ඇති සංස්කෘතික දුර නිසා, මොනම හාදුවක් නොදී සිටීම සෞඛයයට හොඳය.

අදටත්, බොරු දත් ඇඳි දාගත් ගෑණු මිනිස්සු කෙල පෙරාගෙන,  ක්ලෙන්ස් කර ටෝන් කර පවුඩර් දමා අමාරුවෙන් හරි ගැස්සූ මගේ මූණ ඉඹින්නට ආදරයෙන් දිව එද්දී මගේ මුලු සර්වාන්ගයම හිරි වැටෙන්නේ ඉහත කී කරුණු නිසා දැයි මට සිතේ.

By Jahooli Devi

http://www.lexpress.fr/actualites/1/culture/sri-lanka-le-president-veut-punir-les-organisateurs-d-un-concert-indecent-d-enrique-iglesias_1748976.html

Sri Lanka: le président veut punir les organisateurs d'un concert "indécent" d'Enrique Iglesias

Peut-on éprouver du plaisir à se serrer contre un corps semblable au sien ?

Peut-on éprouver du plaisir à se serrer contre un corps semblable au sien ?

Une Analyse littéraire sur l’homosexualité féminine

« Hippolyte, ô ma sœur! tourne donc ton visage,

Toi, mon âme et mon cœur, mon tout et ma moitié »

écrit Baudelaire dans sa poésie d'intitulée Les femmes damnées sur Delphine et Hippolyte. L'amour et le désir n'ont pas de frontière soit dans la vie réelle soit dans le monde littéraire. L’homosexualité féminine,  cette attirance sexuelle d'une femme vers à une autre femme,  décrite également sous le nom de lesbianisme fait souvent écho dans les écritures féministes. On trouve ce thème évoqué aussi dans le roman L'Amande  écrit par Nedjma et Moi, Tituba sorcière écrit par Maryse Condé, qui méritent d'être discuté plus largement.

In the 1970's a call to political lesbianism by radical feminists was based on the principle that heterosexuality , as social norm , was a further indication of women 's oppression . This evolved from the assumption that only 'true' feminists are lesbians because they choose women as sexual partners. Thus, they truly women centred. 1 

Cette idée est itérative tout au long de romans en question : « Pourquoi les femmes ne peuvent-elles se passer des hommes ? » 2  interroge Tituba en montrant que le corps féminin souffre à cause de son attachement au corps masculin. Pourtant, au-delà d'une lecture féministe militante pour l'acceptation sociale et la légalisation d'un tel concept, peut-on voir l'homosexualité féminine comme une expression de désir, une partie intégrante de la vie quotidienne dans ces romans?

« Peut-on éprouver du plaisir à se serrer contre un corps semblable au sien ?Hester m’indiquait-elle le chemin d’une autre jouissance? 3

Condé utilise un autre personnage littéraire Hester dans le roman The Scarlet Letter par Nathaniel Hawthorne qui avait été punie pour l’amour adultère mais se venge du monde hypocrite en se suicidant. Tituba et Hester sont liées intimement dans la prison et leurs corps sont capable d'éveiller le désir. Badra aussi raconte d'abord ses souvenirs d’adolescente et la fascination qu'elle éprouvait pour les prostituées (les hajjalas) de son village qu'elle rencontre au hammam.

J'ai pu les admirer tout mon saoul le jour où je les ai croisées devant le bassin d'eau chaude. […] Moi, je suis restée plantée là à les dévorer des yeux. Elles étaient belles et jumelles. Leurs corps moulés dans des combinaisons en fine dentelle […] Les seins, outrageusement lourds, avaient le téton rose et épanoui comme un grain de grenade. […] Elle m'a pris le visage entre ses mains, telle une coupe, et m'a embrassée presque sur la bouche, légèrement d'abord, puis d'une pression chaude et insistante. 4

Badra est naturellement attirée par la beauté physique des « mauvaises femmes » dont elle observe chaque partie du corps avec curiosité enfantine. Elle met en valeur poétiquement un corps féminin voluptueux, et sa capacité de donner du plaisir. Le baiser qu'elle reçoit de Saba reste un moment inoubliable dans sa vie. C'est un corps féminin qui rend heureux un autre corps féminin. D'autant plus que,  du fait du rejet social, légal et même de la condamnation religieuse d'un tel acte, nous assisterons ici à une énonciation simple de désir du corps. La conscience enfantine ne subit pas les restrictions sociales dans ce cas, l’innocence de Badra en est le témoin.

D'autre part, l'appréciation de la beauté d'une femme par une autre femme est rare car une femme en général préfère critiquer et souvent jalouse de son propre genre. Dans le cas des prostituées,  elles sont le plus souvent  marginalisées et discriminées par les autres femmes.  Par exemple la mère de Badra « a vite fait demi -tour » en les rencontrant au Hammam.  Pour répondre à cette hypocrisie des femmes vis à vis de leur propre genre, Nedjma développe le personnage de Badra qui sympathise avec les femmes marginales, les victimes sexuelles. Elle tente de redéfinir le Hammam comme l'espace collectif idéal pour renforcer la solidarité féminine. 

Le Hammam est un espace privilégié pour le corps féminin dans la culture musulmane et marocaine et en plus d'être un espace de purification, il est un espace de sensualité où la relation de la femme à son corps est très particulière. Il est aussi un espace collectif et socioculturel où «toute une vie sociale est entretenue [...] lorsque les femmes s'y rencontrent, elles recomposent à l'aune de leurs désirs (ou de leurs espérances) l'humanité proche en contractant toutes sortes d'unions matrimoniales et de parenté et en divulguant les on dit ravageurs .5

En plus d'être un espace social, le hammam est le lieu du divertissement, de la nudité et de l'intimité féminine. Donc, c'est cet aspect esthétique que l’écrivaine voulait démontrer à travers sa tentative du thème homosexualité féminine.

Cette idée de lesbianisme réapparaît plusieurs fois dans le roman au cours des différentes étapes de la vie de Badra. Quand elle était au lycée, elle dormait avec une autre fille qui s’appelle Hazima. Badra raconte son expérience de toucher le corps d’Hazima :

« J'ai caressé sa peau, la paume moite et ouverte. Son satin frissonnait sous mes doigts et les grains de beauté ondulaient sous leur passage » 6

Wafa, la domestique tombe amoureuse de vieille Badra  :

« C'est curieux, seule une femme a tenté d'écorcher mon écorce, tombée amoureuse de moi à mon issu avant même que je ne me couche et ne la touche »7

 Le corps de Badra est témoin de ce plaisir refusant toute culpabilisation imposée à elle. Le défi que pose le roman maghrébin est de choisir entre le bonheur personnel et le respect des valeurs morales, ce qui nous apparaît un thème universel dans la littérature alors que le roman caribéenne met une valeur une femme noire libérée d’un système établi. La caractéristique remarquable  de ces deux romancières est qu’elles ont osé à briser les tabous de « la pudeur » et de « la honte » associés à la narration de scènes érotiques au lieu de se limiter à une narration de l’oppression que subissent les femmes. Ainsi, cette banalisation du lesbianisme ou attirance sexuelle des femmes comme une expression de désir  au lieu d'une représentation polémique devient une idée signifiante dans ces deux romans. 

Par Jahooli Devi

Références :

1 Feminism & Postfeminism, Edited by Sarah Gamble, Routeledge, London, 2001, p.263.

2 CONDE, Maryse, Moi,Tituba sorcière..., Mercure de France, 1986, p.30.

3 Ibid,p.190.

4 NEDJMA, L'Amande, Paris, Plon, 2004, p.153.

5 CHEBEL, Malek, L'imaginaire arabo-musulman, Paris, PUF, 1993, p.54.

6 NEDJMA, L'Amande, Paris, Plon, 2004, p.185.

7. NEDJMA, L'Amande, Paris, Plon, 2004, p.283.

Image: Femmes Damnées, 1934, huile sur toile, 162 x 130 cm © The Baudelaire Society and Limouse Foundation Limited)

How to get rid of your EX ?

Here is an exclusive lesson on EX.  Write this on your exercise book.

1.They don't deserve any place in your life, all you Ladies & Gentleman should learn to become exorcists because eventually it will help to expel all these unnecessary evil spirits  from your life. 

2. When you expiate on your sins, sometimes you prefer to run down by the express way but let the Karma decides!

3. As you always have to pay for excess baggage, remember to carry what is really necessary to you.

4. You may excel at filling Excel sheets at the office or keep a track on the exchange rates, but if you don't excise those Exes from your life expunging from your memory & showing them the Exit because their place is exterior, your life will be exploited by past & you will explode everyone your way for no exact reason. Expediency is the solution. 

5. They are indeed a Pest, exterminate them immediately, the more they extinct from this earth the more happiness you will get because they are just the extractors of your joy & energy. 

6. Now get an exemplar of this exemplary lesson on existentialism made easy, that we are responsible for our actions because the Ex did not create the world as you may have thought that he was a Demigod.

7.You should quickly register for an external degree, take extra-mural lessons or get an extensive course on ex-cology to handle this situation in Life, you will have a lot of practical experiments & case studies, lot of exigencies to get some credits, subjects are complex, you will be perplexedand vexed by the department of excology but ultimately you will be an expert on this field with First Class Honours. 

 8. Find an exercise machine, work on your abs during your extra time, learn to express yourself like an expressionist which will add colour to your expressionless life.

 9. Stop being an exhibitionist on social media with your silly pranks because those expositions are so vain. Be a useful extrovert coming out from your dark holes which sucks gradually your life expectancy rate. 

10. Become an Explorer, even if it is exploring your home garden, closing temporarily your Internet explorer because Google does not have solutions for everything.( read this and close!)

So dear friends, stop excoriating the Ex for leaving you because it is the extraordinary relief you can ever have in your life. 

I say it with such an exactitude today & this exuberance with in me should be shared with everyone.

Is this is too much exaggeration for those EXpletive Exes?

By Jahooli Devi

Inseparable even in death - Story of a couple married for 62 years

 

 

Even in death, a couple married for nearly 62 years was inseparable.

Don and Maxine Simpson from Bakersfield, California, died four hours apart on adjoining beds, holding hands during their final hours.

Melissa Sloan said her grandmother died first and when her body was removed from the room, her husband followed.

"All Don wanted was to be with his beautiful wife. He adored my grandmother, loved her to the end of the earth," she told KERO-TV.

He was 90 and she was 87, and they met at a bowling alley in Bakersfield in 1952, got married in the same year.

When civil engineer Don worked for the US Army, the couple spent some time in Germany, where they adopted twin 18-month-old boys from an orphanage.

They returned to Bakersfield, where she worked as a nurse and he owned his own engineering firm.

They are survived by one son and five grandchildren.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-28677585

Use your hands!

Hands are an undervalued part of the body because we always talk about eyes, nose, mouth, ears, brain & heart as the most important parts of the body. Use your hands properly! This article is not about erotica. If you are disappointed, you may leave now. :-)

I will describe you why we should love our hands & how to use hands for a better world. As strange it may sound, you don't have to take this very seriously but take a minute to read if you want to save the world just by using your hands.

Hands & Food

When I first came to France, I was shocked ( yes, I am always shocked) thoroughly, let's say appalled by the view of many plastic forks, spoons & knives that are used to eat food in University canteens & cafés. There were metal ones too, but I am talking about the plastic ones here. We could take as much as utensils for our use & later on we throw them into the bins. I did not see anyone re-using those, except me who kept a plastic fork & a spoon in my bag after using them once thinking about a picnic in the park later.

I don't like the view of people using these plastic cutlery in an abundant manner for their convenience.

Why can't they just use their hands to eat like many Asians do ( Asia means South Asia) ?

All my life, I ate with my hands except during the visits to highly sophisticated restaurants in Colombo where we have to imitate English manners & go home starved after playing with the cutlery.

That's where the value of hands should be highlighted.

We are born with perfect hands with fingers. Chop them off, if you don't need them for a basic survival.

Now, some who are reading my article would say :

Disgusting, to eat with hands using fingers !

I remind kindly those very people who criticise seriously when they see some Asians eating with fingers, to think about other places where they nobly put the fingers! 

God or whoever created the human anatomy gave us ten fingers in our hands, not only for the purpose of grasping, holding or shaking hands but also to eat , to survive by eating.

Instead, people use their hands for totally useless things.

Men & women, think about the weird instances where you use hands!

I used those intimate details just to prove that you should not be ashamed to eat with your hands in public because they are many shameful things in this world than that.

I faced this problem in French tables where they decorate with millions of cutlery in order, where we have to select the correct item to eat as if we will have to face digestion problems if not properly selected. I am not criticising their culture or table manners but I was annoyed when some people told me that I am not civilized, that eating with fingers is a clear sign of uncivilized manners. «  Il faut évoluer » You should evolve is the phrase I heard. Should I care ? I never loose appetite even in most difficult times in life ! We have evolved too much, that is why are close to the apocalypse.

Why you should be using hands?

When we eat with fingers, there is a different flavour to food.
If you eat using those cutlery all your life, you would not understand what I say. But ask Asians, they would describe you. Rice mixed with curries & succulent chicken can only be enjoyed by eating with hand. I feel empty every time I eat with those metals or plastic & I leave the table dissatisfied. If I get a fingerbowl in restaurants, or a find a washroom nearby, I am not afraid to eat with hands even if thousands look at me with surprising eyes, or disgusting eyes because I am aware I do no harm to anyone, no harm to nature because I don't leave behind anything to recycle. 

Some people think :

Yeah everything would be recycled so we don't have to worry, but they are not aware that recycling would also cost a lot & if they avoided the process of recycling they could have saved  more & more money & energy.

Some like to complain  & here are some funny answers.

Eating with hands is annoying, I spill everywhere : Unless you are paralysed, with a bit of practice you will manage, Dear

How can I cut meat ?  I hope you still have your set of teeth.

After eating with hands, I have to wash hands : Oh, I thought being civilised is not being lazy ! So, go & wash your hands. No water, seriously ? Use Coca cola.

My hands smell : No one is coming  to kiss your hands today !

Is it hygienic ? There are millions in Africa, Middle East & Asia, over populated, I wish they would die in mass just because of this unchanging habit !

If you can eat Pizza, Hamburger, Chips & bread with your hands, I am confused, why can't you eat the other food?

Now, my innocent thoughts are not enough to convince many civilised people. Let me give you an example from a research because something needs to be proved scientifically in the labs & would be approved by a Jury to put into practice in western society because what can a Sri Lankan villager know about protecting the environment!

Here is something I found : Apparently eating with hands is good for health.

In the Vedic tradition, eating with ones hands is tied to the practice of hand mudras – or meditative gestures using the hands and other body parts. The hands are honored as a beautiful ‘organ of action.’ A famous Vedic sloka or verse suggests that divinity rests within human effort – brought about through the hands.

When we touch our food before putting it into our mouths the millions of nerve endings on the tips of our fingers are getting a temperature and texture reading that is immediately sent to the stomach – like a warning signal. Ayurvedic wisdom teaches that our bodies can respond to this food-touch by producing the needed enzymes and digestive juices before the food even meets our lips – and that the fingers themselves even contain enzymes which start the digestive process upon first touch.

source:http://guardianlv.com/2013/06/eating-with-your-hands-is-healthier/#E7OHqc3E4lWxTAcr.99

I don't think I have to rewrite this in a different way. My father was always right that he never eats with utensils. The only time I saw him using them was when his hands were injured. He is so healthy, never had digestive problems.

A lot of Sri Lankans make a huge effort to eat with these western invented utensils in Five Star hotels that they end up having an orchestra there ! We laughed our head off listening to the troubles that friends faced eating with forks & knives ; like flying chicken, lobsters untouched, rice spilled etc. 

If we can make a trend of eating with hands, I think we would be reducing a lot of plastic.

If you girls disagree to eat with your hands, at least carry a metal knife, fork & spoon in your beautiful handbags, not to kill anyone but to eat! 

Guys, if you can carry a huge iphone in the pockets, find a way to carry the cutlery, my head is too small to think a solution for guys. They are so cool so they would easily eat with hands. Flexible, I would say!

It is just a way of life, a little sacrifice for your health, for all of us & for the environment.

By Jahooli Devi

Artichoke Hearts

Are you simply choked up because of your Artichoke heart?

Artichoke is a vegetable! 

How come a vegetable has a place in a literary blog?

There is an expression in French " avoir un cœur d'un artichaut" originates from the proverb " coeur d'artichaut, une feuille pour tout le monde" which can be directly translated to English as to have an artichoke heart, a leaf for everyone" 

This expression is used to refer to someone who falls in love very easily, who is very inconstant in love as well as who is ready to love anyone who comes across on his or her way. 

Sometimes, people use this with negative connotation to refer to someone who has a fickle mind. It is not same as Don Juans who constantly go after love, rather the Artichokes fall in love with several people because they never had a long term love affair even though they are all ready for that.

How do you know that you have an Artichoke heart?

As soon as you meet a man or a woman, you fall in love easily. ( You are at the dinner date, you have already imagined your wedding & perhaps trying to cook artichoke for your future husband!)

You always believe that you just found your soul mate. ( He or She is born for you, that God decided to send this angel to love you forever) 

Love is the only word that interests you & you constantly think about it. ( The day that the word LOVE ceases, you would die too, of course with your Artichoke! ) 

You have a lot of love failures in life because you love selflessly, without expecting any love in return. ( I love you because I love you, now, keep on telling that looking at the sky because the person you love is busy buying artichokes for his new girl friend)

Problems encountered by Artichokes:

She or He gives a little bit of love to everyone who shows at least a bit of interest in them ( As it it is his or her DUTY to love the world , voilà une feuille pour toi, mange! ( Here is a leaf for you, eat !)

But, most of the time , these artichokes love people who don't merit at least a rotten artichoke. It is their problem.  Therefore , they go through many deceptions in love, suffer always , complain about their over cooked hearts.

The tragedy with these vegetables is that the day they meet the real lover, who expects real love & care, they no longer have any leaves to offer them because everything was given to useless people.

Think about  your friends who are like Artichokes, they must be really tired by now.  The only advise, we can give them is to keep their vegetable heart in the freezer, so one day, they can offer it to someone who really wants to eat it.

By Jahooli Devi

How to get rid of Love failures?

You can have almost EVERYTHING in LIFE, if you work hard towards your goals, that degree, that job, that car, that house. But, you can't have EVERYONE in your Love Life because as simple as that, they are not things , but people.

People function differently, their hearts, their minds, their souls, their hopes & dreams. Therefore, we can't own another person unless that person is willing to be owned by us. 

It is a harsh truth we try to ignore, but at one point in life, we should accept the truth. If not our life will be a failure, even the person you loved so dearly might even laugh at your folly, calling you crazy. We should give our maximum to win their hearts, but we should not give our whole life. Your life is precious, your happiness should be important to you as it is important to your lover who ignores you. 

If someone rejects you, call them a Loser, because you don't lose anything from a person who does not love you, but they lose you, your love, your heart, your kisses, your smiles. Think, who is the loser? 

Don't be discouraged if your love life fails, the moment  that you let go one person who is not meant to you, there will be a hundred waiting to pour you with the showers of love which you were deprived for so long. 

Was not it LOVE you were expecting from that person? So, now you have it from a new person. You can't reject new love saying it is not same.  

How could love be different from one to another? It is same, Love is same, only people are different. 

The same phrase you used " I love you" is valid for another person. Don't be afraid to say that, if the next one in your list is eligible for that, open your heart, never be stubborn not to love again. You should always love more & more while keep on believing that LOVE exists.  The day you stop believing in love, you would only be a walking skeleton, therefore, you should love incessantly.

It takes a great courage to love , it is true . It takes an equally a great courage to stop loving someone who does not want you & start loving another person too. 

Love should not be wasted at any point, like a river, every drop should be used to water, the fields of love, for they would be greener with your experience in love & would definitely bear greater fruits, only if you are willing to accept the truth & embrace the change.

By Jahooli Devi

Are you in the right relationship with the right person?

When someone falling in love, they never expect it to fail. You get in to a relationship with great expectations on love filled with hopes & promises. But, as you can see out there, all the relationships are not going all right. Some exist for the sake of a relationship.

Sometimes, you may know that this is not going to work, but still you want it, so…you justify any crazy thing your partner does and try to stay cool hanging on to the relationship with a lot of expectations. At some point, this may work for few days and again you suffer as the same before.

What do you feel in your relationship? Are you happy with it, or unhappy? 
Here are few signs that can help you to understand whether it's worth to hold on or just let it go, rather than hurting yourself.

# The connection – You never know why your relationship is going on. There is no romance, both live in separate worlds. No one knows what the other is doing. Both just exist. Even you also wonder  “What the heck I’m doing?, Is this a relationship ?”

# Hurting – You feel hurt, even when he talks you get hurt, even he doesn’t, you get hurt. Sometimes you don’t know why you are hurt exactly. Or you are hurting yourself, thinking about him, so deeply.

# No future – Perhaps your relationship is great, both of you love each other in good manner. But when you are all alone, you may feel…what is the future of this relationship? You cannot see any future for this. And you may feel, at any moment, this relationship would collapse.

# Togetherness –  Your partner doesn’t pay good attention to your day to day life. He or she may not be actively engaged in day to day life. Even, when you need them to be involved in some of your events , they don’t to do so. 

# Physical attraction – Sometimes, you can’t remember the last day  that you made love to your partner. In the bedroom, when you want to be romantic, your partner may prefer to turn aside and fall a sleep. 

# Trust –  No more trust, you or your partner doesn’t trust each other. There may be valid reasons for this. But rather than discussing these issues, still you carry the relationship with the suspicious minds. 

# Different lives – There may be not any meaningful conversation between you two. There is no special thing to discuss, or any topics that lead to another topic, and conversation is not interesting any more. It’s because, you don’t have any common values, ideas or desires, or any common expectations with your partner... Simply both of you live in different lives.

# Endless fights – Mostly you may argue with your partner for an issue. Then, again both of you, had enough of the fight and, calm down. And then think everything is cool. But in few days, again the same fight or argument starts for very same issue. If the same issue stagnates in your lives and fighting  continues, is there any good for long term?  
 

# Impressing – Your partner is pleasing other people to impress them and win their hearts. But he or she never does any of this to you to make you happy.

# Fault finders – Your partner always think that you are not good enough for them. Always finding, even tiny faults of yours and scolding at you. And your partner breaks your mind each and every day with it. And they are expecting you to change for them, because you have many faults (Fake or very tiny) and you are not good enough for them.

# Manipulating your love - Your partner may get your love and caresses for advantages. Your partner may know that you never leave them. And they do what they want to do without thinking about your feelings. Even when you suffer upon what they do, they will do that, because they know you don’t leave them.  

# Company is not joyful – When both of you together, you may feel uncomfortable. Sometime you may feel it’s boring and rather good to be with your friends.

# No respect at all – Your partner is paying enough respect for you? And do you do the same for him or for her? It’s not just because of your partner, but for their individualities? Respect will play a major role in a relationship. But remember respect is not love.  

# Insecure personalities - People who are having insecure personalities never confront their partner. Instead of confronting you, they try to point out your faults (fake) and try to make guilty situation in your mind of what you are doing.

# Holding something? – You are in the relationship, because both of you want to carry some baggage, bond or something? And upon that you think, happiness will come in near future? 

Honestly…how many signs of above, that you can see in your relationship? 
How many of these signs are totally applicable to you? 
Now…you have to decide what to do!

By Manu Fernando.