Thursday, June 26, 2014

Time to say goodbye


It’s time to say goodbye to you. People can change, that’s obvious. I always accepted that truth.

I know how your feelings are.  Love and likes…those emotions always need freedom, I supposed… before love converts to the hate, before the likes convert to the dislikes, they need the freedom; I understand your necessity.

I never had hard feelings for you, though. It’s true…I really liked to stay with you. It’s not a lie. You always kept me alive; gave me a hope to go through. But, I knew that some day or another that I was going loose you. It was meant to be. But, I didn’t think it would come this soon.

After three hours of waiting, you came finally, for the last meeting.

We went inside a coffee shop.

You ordered burgers and coffee and we moved to a table. We sat side by side. It was so uncomfortable for me to sit that way. It was because, I could nott see your face directly.

Suddenly, it began to rain again. During the whole day, it was pouring and gloomy. I already got enough wet to catch a cold, while standing outside of the pavements of the shop waiting for you. This time it was a heavy shower. Nobody could not go in or out of the café. I kind of liked it because now , I can spend much time with you, at least for the one last time.  I just want to look at your face, but it’s so difficult to see your face sitting right next to you. I squeezed my own fingers and palm to be relaxed.

You began to blame the rain,

“You see…this miserable rain is not gonna stop, today...gosh…my whole day is going to be ruined”

But you don’t know that how much I love the rain, now. It’s sad.

A waitress brought the cheese burgers and hot coffee to the table, I didn’t feel any hunger or appetite to eat or drink.  You picked a burger instantly like a ravening wolf and began eat greedily. After having finished almost one burger… you asked me to eat too, while picking the second burger.

“Hey…don’t you eat? mmmmm…these burgers are amazing”

It made me pretty nervous and surprised. You were cursing the rain, while I was wishing the rain. You were tasting the burger, while I was refusing the burger.

I thought to myself, someone’s likes are someone’s dislikes. Someone’s dislikes are someone’s likes. Likes and dislikes are depending on the state of the mind of the poeple. If we are happy on the very same thing, we may never say good bye to each other!

“You gonna call me? After I leave here?”

“I don’t know, maybe, I love to do so…but sometimes my calls will make you uncomfortable”

“No…way…I’m always happy to stay in touch with you...You can call or Skype me...Whenever you want”

But, I know how you tried to ignore me for last few weeks, even when I tried to call or Skype,  you were ignoring my calls. But honestly…I’m ok with that, it’s because if I cannot make any happiness or comfort in your mind, what else you are hoping from me?

“Carla…Shall I come to drop you to the air port, tomorrow?”

“Oh…Thanks…how kind of you, Josh...?…But…Rico…will come tonight here, to pick me up from home, early in the morning...”


“Oh…Yeah…you know?.... he is a good guy, one day you should meet him…he even found me a good place to stay there until I finish my studies”

I looked outside through the large glass window. Still… it’s raining outside. I really wanted to go outside and I wanted to get wet again. It’s fine to fall sick, it’s because I was sick anyway.

Again she broke the silence….

“Look Josh…I must go now…I got a lot to do for tomorrow…I must get ready”

“Mmmm..Yeah…yeah…you should” I spoke with a shaking voice.

“Eh…Anyway I call you…Josh…I call you from time to time…we can stay touch...You know?”

But, I knew for sure you would never call me. Both of us knew that it was a lie. You don’t have any reason to call me. But, you just wanted to tell me somethin, just to kill the silence.

She stood up...And I too…then you gave me a one last hug. That hug almost made me cry…Because I knew…it was the last. I didn’t want to let you go. You patted on my shoulder. I moved away from you. Then… Both of us went to the door step…it was still pouring outside.

“May be I should call a cab Josh…otherwise…I have to stay in this boring café for all day long”

She called a taxi cab near by the parking lot. Then, she said final “Goodbye” to me and left.

I really didn’t know what do next. So... I just came out from the café and walked along  the street, while everyone was laughing at me…

“Crazy man”

By Manu Fernando
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