Monday, March 31, 2014

Love needs Care forever


Some people believe love is happening for no reason  between two people. It just happens and there is no exact reason or definition for that. Is that the way you think?

Yes…above conclusion may be very true at the very beginning of a love affair. It’s because at the first sight, we feel love just the for first impression. That’s the attraction. It happens automatically. But this feeling may last just for few months.

As time passes by, we get to know each other better and this understanding will be the key for perfect long term love affair. In that case, to keep this wonderful love alive, we need to show real concerns for sure. In short, we need to invest on love! How to do it?
Time may destroy gradually the feelings of Care, Love and Concern even in the best of relationships. Sometimes, people stop doing the easy nice little things they used to do for each other because they're too tired or they start to wait for the other person to do something nice.
For example : 

He used to bring me flowers, but not any more !
She used to cook me nice food, but not any more!

People like to dwell in the past thinking what other USED to do than try to do something in the present. That is the main problem.

Eventually, they feel taken for granted, and they start to feel lonely & frustrated.

Many people think that love should not require any effort. But the truth is, love requires regular refinement of basic relationship skills. Skills such as listening with understanding, expressing feelings with kindness and resolving conflict without lapsing into criticism. Couples use these relationship enhancement skills generously in the early stages of their relationship. Over time, however, people stop using their skills and rely more and more with increasing resentment on the hope of getting what they want. They stop doing what they gladly did at the beginning.

Some people think, “If I have to work so hard in love, something must be wrong with the relationship” or “Isn't love supposed to be spontaneous?” " Should I be the one saving this relationship? "

Never think in that way. It surely needs care and concern from both parties. Otherwise one day, your place in the relationship, may be taken by another person forever.

Do not wait till that moment!

By Manu Fernando

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